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an angel. a vision.

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i tried a thing recently- something for me. something in a space all for me- no one around that i knew letting and allowing myself to "feel" starting with that. sitting with that for a minute. the moment i walked in i was not to say uncomfortable but i was not feeling comfy and to most we might run but i am learning that uncomfortable is growth- it s good place to be IF it has good intention- its sought out with purpose. i signed my name, applied a pleasant/relaxing oil to my wrist and received a welcoming hug. YES a hug... from a girl that embraced me like i was her very best friend that she has been waiting all day to see me! i then took a seat- not in back, not in front but in the middle and an end seat. ((must have room for an exit should it be needed)). mind you i arrived in an active tee, black leggings & my hair up- i was worried i would need a yoga mat but was SURE they would have one for me. NOPE it was a seated arrangement and there were jeans, street
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"Eleven Tacos"

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tonight i decided that i am writing a book. i have decided that i/we my family... we have a story to tell and a story to share. everyone loves and listens to a good story. recently my grandma was dx with cancer, a rare cancer, most likely one that she has actually lived well with for years- her recent blood infection MAY be to cause... unsure but more to follow. anyhow, i hope to be there in all the ways that i can for my grandma. she has ALWAYS been there for me and will also make and allow for me to take priority, its the least that i can do but be there for her emotionally and to be a piece of her loving family support- encouraging hope and providing a lending ear, shoulder or that extra hug and "love you" that she needs! she is strong. she says whats on her mind. she takes no bull- its how ALL women should carry and present themselves, i want her to speak her mind in this scary unknown season and to take NO bull- to NOT surrender but to carry on and love hard not
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circles of adjustment

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at times i feel like i am literally leading a circus- that is seriously the best way to describe it! i am all over the place i am trying to make everyone happy with this show. i also feel like any other wife, mom, grand(daughter), employee is able to identify with what i am about to TRY and describe- but wait. its all the same we've all heard it, we've all expressed it - am i doing enough, how can i do it all, how does she do it etc... etc... etc! WELP i am actually going to talk about the circles that I am adjusting to TODAY. here- lets begin with this- exactly 11 months ago (just a one month shy of a year) my world FLIPPED a 180. i walked away from what i knew/felt to be my passion, my heart, mostly my everything. WORK. i was a branch of a 4th generation link within the legacy of my family's long lasting work ethic. i walked away from a self built, self guided way of life; i walked away from working from home i walked away from being able to be home for my k
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Intro

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Hey Guys! (there was a time i was scolded for addressing a group of men & women as "Guys") it was in a group counseling setting- where i happened to be assisting in facilitating. "oh GREAT so another thing i am NOT good at or i AM actually good at but let's not give this young pretty girl any credit- right" -- well anyway- thats how i read that. in my time of grad school. in a program full of addicts and those recovering. and there i was little did anyone know where i was coming from or my story- i was NOT in recovery and i was NOT about to share my story. another day, another time- just not there. funny thing was, life at that time put me there for a reason- to later prepare me for a life of continued chaos. i felt, that as a kid teenager young adult an adult i lived chaos (silent chaos maybe even MILD chaos) but i was still able to thrive so ALL of it was OK. i was better than that. i learned a lot from that. i remained cautious (unable to trust, id eve
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